Attack On Jerry Springer!
by LolitaArmin129
Summary: The AOT gang appears in Jerry Springer!
1. Chapter 1

Attack On Jerry Springer!

Chapter 1: Is My Boyfriend Cheating On Me?!

 _"JERRY! JERRY! JERRY JERRY!"_ The live audience chanted and cheered as Jerry Springer appeared on the main stage. "Hello, and welcome back to another episode of Jerry Springer!" Jerry said."Today we are here because this lovely young lady Mikasa Ackerman is here to prove that her Boyfriend Eren Jeager has been _cheating_ on her!"

The entire audience gasped as the camera zoomed in on Mikasa. The Asian did _not_ looked pleased. She wore a deathly glare that would have put even the manliest of men to tears. "Eren Jeager is a fucking horn dog and I'm here to prove it once and for all!" She growled. "Now Mikasa, tell us why you think Eren is cheating on you?" Jerry asked walking over to her with his microphone.

The enraged Mikasa snatched the microphone and got up from her chair holding up a plastic Ziploc bag filled with "evidence ". " Exhibit A.." Mikasa said pulling out a pair of super frilly lace things "I found _these_ underneath his pillow last night while he was out!" She held them out high for the whole audience to see. Shocked gasps and oohhs and ahhss filled the studio as they looked at the underwear.

"And I take it you don't wear thongs Miss Ackerman?" Jerry asked snickering." _HELL_ NO! THIS LOOKS LIKE SOMETHING A PORN STAR WOULD WEAR!" She growled. Reaching back in the bag she then pulled out a few long blonde hairs showing it to the audience. " and since when the _fuck_ do Asians have blonde hair Jerry!? I found these all over the bed!" She exclaimed. She then turned her attention to the screen where a picture of a small curvy woman was shown in sexy black lingere and posing for the camera."EXHIBIT C! I FOUND A PICTURE OF SOME RANDOM HOE ON HIS PHONE!" She said. The person shown in the picture was only visible from the shoulders down and laying in Eren's bed posing.

Jerry's eyes widened when he looked at the evidence. "Well it looks like Eren has a little explaining to do.." Jerry replied. "Damn right he does!" Mikasa growled."Ladies and Gentleman please welcome Eren to the stage!" The audience immediately broke out into a bunch of BOOs and profanities as poor Eren walked onto the stage. _"BOOOOOOOOO!"_ the audience yelled as Eren took a seat next to Mikasa.

"So Eren, your girlfriend has told me a lot of interesting things about you" Jerry said looking over to the mangy haired boy."Jerry I swear to God it's not what you think!" Eren replied sweating bullets."Like Hell it is!" Mikasa said snatching Eren by his collar."Who did you bring in my bed Eren!? Was it that _bitch_ Annie!?"

As if on cue Annie walked onto the stage with a super relaxed and bored look on her face."Mikasa, you're delusional as hell if you think I would sleep with _Eren_ of all people.." She replied scowling in disgust. Mikasa got up from her chair and immediately jumped Annie causing a dog fight.

 _"JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!"_ The audience screamed in excitement as ten security guards swarmed the stage and attempted to pull the two women off of each other. "Nobody touches my Eren!" Mikasa growled _"Especially you bitch!"_ Screams of excitement flooded the room as Annie scrambled out of the security guards grasps and tackled Mikasa to the ground.

 _DING! DING! DING!_

 _"JERRY! JERRY! JEERY! JERRY!"_

"This just in people!" Jerry said gaining the audience's attention."It appears we have a surprise mystery guest!" The two girls and Eren stopped and watched as a short petite person stepped out onto the stage covered from head to toe in a dark green hooded cloak."The hell is that?" Annie asked still on top of Mikasa on the ground.

"Mikasa.." The Person spoke, "Annie didn't do it.." Mikasa's eyes then widened in shock "Armin?..is that you?" She asked. "What's the cream puff doing on _this_ show!?" Annie asked. "And what's up with the hood?" Armin looked up at Mikasa and blushed before taking off the cloak letting it drop to the floor.

Every one in the audience screamed in excitement and had a nosebleed at what Armin was wearing underneath. Armin..sweet, awkward, dorky little Armin was wearing the exact same risque lingere seen in the picture along with some dark red lipstick putting _both_ girls on stage to shame." _I_ slept with Eren.." He said sheepishly.

Eren tried to hide his nosebleed in shame. " _WHAT THE HELL?!"_ Annie said. Mikasa's entire face darkened as she slowly got up and made her way towards Armin. "Uhh Mikasa? C-calm down.." Mikasa cracked her knuckles giving Armin a look of death. "Armin..say goodbye to your manhood" Armin screamed as Mikasa chased him around the studio with a blade and a shotgun."GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE!"

 _"JERRY!JERRY!JERRY!JERRY!"_

Jerry, Eren, and Annie sweatdropped looking at the spectacle before them "

"Well that's it for this episode! Tune in next time for the next episode of Jerry Springer!"


	2. Chapter 2

Attack On Jerry Springer pt 2

My Girlfriend is dating a potato!?

 _"JERRY!JERRY!JERRY! JERRY!"_

the audience chanted once again as Jerry appeared on stage."hello, hello, and welcome to more Jerry Springer! Last time we had Eren, Mikasa, Armin,and Annie on set with us and it did _not_ end well.." He said pointing the camera to the four. "Er..Armin you doing okay over there son?" Jerry asked inwardly cringing.

Armin was still wearing the hooded cloak and black lingerie, but was now sporting a black eye on his pretty face and was holding a raw steak against it, covering it from view. "Ugh..I'm fine..".he groaned." Now what have we learned?" Mikasa asked. "No more sleeping with my friend's boyfriend" Armin cringed.

"Good boy" Mikasa smiled petting him.

Eren was sitting next to Mikasa crying and shivering in fear while holding a bag of ice against his nuts."I'm a good boy...I'm a good boy...I'm a good boy..." The brunette whimpered rocking back and forth clearly traumatized.

Mikasa however looked very pleased indeed and was quietly smiling and waving to the camera. "hello Jerry.." The raven haired beauty said.

Annie however looked like she didn't give any fucks about being on T.V at the moment.

"Glad to have you guys back Mikasa" Jerry nodded. "Now on this segment on Jerry Springer we have a very odd couple joining us today!" He announced.

"Ladies and gentleman let's give it up for stripper Sasha Braus and her bartender boyfriend Connie Springer!"

The audience whooped and hollered when they seen Sasha and Connie walk on stage. Connie however didn't look very happy. "Now Connie, tell us your dillema" Jerry said.

"Yeah well I have my smoking hot girlfriend over here, Sasha right?" He started gesturing to Sasha."we had the most kickass relationship with each other for over three years...until...*sniffle* until..!" The bald male sniffled tearing up.

"Until what Connie?" Jerry asked.

The audience leaned in too, also curious to know.

"UNTIL SHE STARTED CHEATING ON ME WITH A POTATO!" he wailed. _"A MOTHER FUCKING POTATO~!"_

The audience gasped in horror at this.

"A _potato!?"_ Jerry asked in disbelief.

Sasha bit her lip and blushed in embarrassment at this. "Y-yeah.. This one here" she said looking away and holding up a potato with a smiley face drawn on to it."What the fuck Sasha?" Annie asked raising an eyebrow from her seat.

"I..I CAN _'_ T HELP IT JERRY! I _LOVE_ MR. POTATO~!" Sasha squealed. Connie was now sobbing on the floor at this point."I even dance for him!see watch!" Sasha then set down and started pole dancing giving him and everybody else in the room a show making all the men go wild.

Armin and Jerry was blushing at the spectacle while Connie cried. " you never dance for ME like that!" Connie whined. "That's just wrong..." Mikasa said shaking her head. "well miss Braus I see your very committed to " Jerry commented.

"Yes Jerry but at the same time I really love Connie too!" Sasha replied frowning."I just don't know who to pick.."

"PICK ME!" Connie yelled angrily. "I make love to you AND make you laugh on a regular basis so clearly that should give you a clue right!?"

"Eh heh heh..about that.." Sasha replied nervously. "I've.. Kinda been faking my orgasms with you up until now" the brunette confessed. "Mr Potato just feels so much better..!" She sighed blissfully."WHAT!? BUT IT'S A POTATO! A MOTHER FUCKING DICKLESS POTATO!" Connie shrieked

He then turned to who was sitting next to Armin and growled."I'LL KILL YOU AND TURN YOU INTO HASH BROWNS YOU BASTARD!" The bald man roared lunging on the potato."CONNIE NO I LOVE HIM!" Sasha wailed.

 _JERRY!JERRY!JERRY!JERRY!_

Mikasa watched deadpanned, Armin was trembling in fear, Eren was still rocking back and forth in his chair traumatized. Annie however still gave no fucks.

"Ugh ahem! Any who! We hope you all enjoyed today's segment of Jerry Springer! Tune in next time!"

(A/N: well hoped you all liked the fic!)


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